TV: Primeval - Season 2, Episode 2

If you've never seen Primeval then you need to know that it is essentially a "Monster of the Week" style show. And this week the monsters are... giant worms. Not as in Dune-style massive, mind; more dog-sized. As monsters go, they sound almost as weak as the first season's Dodo episode, though at least that had a killer virus to help liven things up.

Now, to be fair, the worms aren't as weak as they sound. Hidden in mist, their sudden attacks are almost surprising enough to make the viewer jump (but not quite), and there's some degree of eeriness as they potential skulk around nearby. But they seem to spit mud, for some reason, which I at first thought was perhaps mud-a-like poison, but it doesn't seem to have any effect whatsoever. And when one of them got Connor's head in its mouth, for a good 30 seconds it seemed, he came out just a bit gooey when Cutter finally got round to killing it. So not that threatening at all, really. In fact, the worms were at their worst when they did, spraying baby worms all over our heroes which then tried to burrow into their skin, in what seemed to be a desperate attempt at dragging things out by about 90 seconds.

I'm probably being too harsh on Primeval again. As I believe I said before, it manages the whole action/adventure thing moderately well. Sometimes. Other times it's just a bit dragging and repetitive. It also seems to be fighting a losing battle against its on-going plot threads, either like it really really wants to remain a Monster of the Week show but those pesky story arcs won't go away, or like the writers really really want to turn it into a conspiracy-based serial but don't quite have the nerve to lose those monsters.

As far as I'm concerned, the mysteries hinted at are more interesting: what does Helen want (as she turns up, briefly and for no good reason, this week)? How will the whole Jenny/Claudia thing play out? What was all that about with the undead security guard / soldier thing? And just what is the point of the anomalies / where do they come from / etc? That last question is an especially interesting one; one that the show keeps asking but I'm afraid will never answer. It seems to be central to the whole purpose of this little group and their ARC -- finding out what the anomalies are, where they come from, how to stop them -- yet they're just stuck fighting the latest things to come through it each week. This would be fine if the anomalies had been somehow explained, if they were just an occurrence and it was their effects that needed halting; but the whole mystery of what they are is constantly repeated, central to the point of the team, and yet they never get a chance to look into it because they're always having to shoot raptors or behead worms.

I'm not saying I want Primeval to switch from monster-killing action to a group of men in a room debating time travel phenomena. But it would be nice if there was some progression, or some hint that they'll eventually find answers. They've made the existence and point of the anomalies into a mystery rather than a simple fact, so now they need to pay it off and explain it at some point... I just don't believe they'll ever bother. Maybe I'm underestimating them, but on the evidence so far I'm not sure.

In the meantime, next week's sabretooth cat looks like it could be fun...

TV: Primeval - Season 2, Episode 1

ITV's answer to Doctor Who is back for a second series, this time with 7 episodes -- conveniently bumping the total number to an international-sales-friendly 13. Not usually a good sign for longevity. But regardless -- Primeval is Torchwood crossed with Jurassic Park for a family audience, essentially, as a team of semi-qualified pretty people chase dinosaurs (and other prehistoric beasties) that have fallen through time all over England.

Primeval's main problem, for me, is that it's actually quite slow-moving. For all the quick editing, slick direction, good quality special effects, and quick start to the plot, once things get to the meat of the situation not much happens. For instance, this week's episode resolves (sort of) and moves on from last season's cliffhanger in a matter of seconds, then rushes us through a revised setup, before sending the team out on a new mission, all within about five minutes. And then, for the next 50, they run around a shopping centre trying (and usually failing) to stop a pair of raptors. Sensible plotting and large chunks of continuity gradually go out the window in the quest for new set pieces to prolong the story. The thing is, there's just not enough actual plot to fill the running time, so we're left with half a storyline stretched out with repetitive action sequences. Usually non-sensical ones. That repeat themselves.

I don't want to be too harsh on Primeval. Well, OK, I do a little. It does have its moments, now and then: some of the action is quite decent, the mystery of the anomalies is occasionally intriguing, and there's even the odd moment of something approaching character development. Even the acting seems to have improved on season one, although as I came to this after watching last night's Echo Beach it would be hard not to look good. On that topic, Moving Wallpaper's Ben Miller is here, still as hopelessly out of place as ever -- though I've come to believe that's not really his fault: he's great in his show with Alexander Armstrong, he's the best thing about the whole of that Cornish-based-soap-production-hour (I need to find a catchier combined title for that...), but in Primeval his character is simply badly written. He's actually quite well-cast for the role intended, it's just that the intended role shouldn't be such dismal comic relief. And now they've given him an all-too-similar and equally bizarre sidekick/deputy, just to compound the problem. Oh dear.

This is just one of Primeval's flaws that, in spite of the fun and excitement, do still niggle away, occasionally bursting through into unmissable obviousness. Primeval can be fun, but you suspect that with a bit more effort that sentence could read, "Primeval is fun."